Dog, the one with the blue collar
April 23, 2023
I tried to open my eyes this morning, but I couldn’t. I felt strange. I felt small. Before I went to bed last night, I could open my eyes, and I felt big, and now I am small. Even if I can’t open my eyes to see my body, I can feel that it is small. In fact, it doesn’t feel like my body at all. I cannot open my eyes, but I can hear whimpering all around me, and I feel other little bodies squiggling and squirming around me. They sound like puppies, which is strange because why would I be laying in a pile of puppies. Why would I be laying in a pile of puppies when I went to sleep in my bed last night in the middle of Ohio? Is this a dream? Maybe I’m not awake at all. Maybe I am dreaming, and this is why I cannot open my eyes, and this is why I can hear puppies, and this is why I feel a strange sensation like licking, and this is why I feel small.
That must be it. I am dreaming. Then when I wake up, I will be back in my bed, I will open my eyes and put on my glasses. I will go to my kitchen, brew a cup of Folgers- black with sugar- and then sit down to read the New York Times. I will do the crossword while I eat my two eggs, scrambled, with two pieces of sourdough toast topped with butter and two pieces of turkey bacon because as much as I love real bacon, my doctor says that it is not good for me. So, I settle for this alternative. When I am done, I will put on my blue plaid shirt, because it is Thursday, and my khakis, and I will drive to my job as an insurance adjuster. I must admit, it is curious that I feel awake, and it does not feel like a dream. How would I be so aware of what is happening in my dream and yet be aware that I am dreaming and planning for what I will do when I wake up? Is this lucid dreaming? That is a term I’ve heard more than once, but I haven’t read much about it. I will have to do that when I wake up also. Search: Lucid Dreaming.
I feel as if I have been asleep for a long time. Much longer than a normal night. This must also be part of my dream. Dreams can be like that. They can feel like they last for hours when in reality they last on average twenty minutes. I do know that. I believe I read about the average length of dreams in an issue of Reader’s Digest. Also, something I read: hummingbirds flap their wings more than 4,000 times a minute. I like to learn new things. I like facts. I like numbers. I like data. At least I think I do. I’m starting to question everything. I feel strange. I can hear sounds around me, the whimpering but also other people whispering, and I definitely don’t feel like I am dreaming at all, even though that seems to be the best explanation for everything. Because why would there be people whispering in my room when I live alone? And what is this warm feeling all around me? Why do I feel like I am being picked up? It feels like floating. I feel safe and also very, very scared. I am certain I am awake now. I can feel my heart beating very quickly. I still cannot open my eyes and now I am making the same strange, pitiful whimpering sound that I could hear all around me. I don’t know what’s happening, but I do not think I am in Ohio anymore.